I have always been called shy and introverted. Quiet. But people close to me also see my crazy, funny and silly side. I figure if I can be outgoing with people I know the only thing stopping me from doing that with people I don't know is: Me. I start small. I make eye contact and give a smile or say good morning to a stranger as we pass each other on the street. I have given myself a target of 2-3 people to do this with every week. That also forces me to leave my house 😆
I want a life that challenges me with discomfort and new possibilities for growth, but at the same time, I'm too afraid of uncertainties. Whenever things go out of my plans or out of control. I almost lost my direction and mind. I'm trying to manage it but it's difficult, my fear always steps in and forces me to play the "safe game" although inside of me, someone wants to be challenged and wants growth, but I think the same human inside me is afraid of discomfort and stops me... It's like a tug of war inside...
Having trodden the safe path since the middle of the last century I know what pleases me and keeps me feeling comforted. I have always shied away from that feeling of uncertainty unless heaved in by circumstance, and always having come out the other side in one piece, I have been looking for challenges that let me ease (somewhat) out of the comfort zone. I have always found it difficult to let myself go in social situations, but with people I know, it is very easy to let the (I believe) real me out of his cage. I have found over the years that it doesn't hurt too much to Embare your ass once in a while. Figuratively of course.
As I am in a new relationship and meeting new people quite regularly I have the opportunity to try and put this new attitude into practice. Sometimes it works better than others. I can always retreat into comfort when I wish, but for now, pushing the envelope a little more than I am used to is order of the day. So far so good, growth is sometimes painful but in the end worth the struggle.
I was in the customer service business for years, in a position that essentially forced me to meet and befriend people. Apparently, my introverted self managed it well, as when I told people I was very shy, I heard disbelief.
I’ve not worked outside the home for years now, and I love it! I definitely would choose the safe environment. However, I’ve found that I have increasingly become less independent, and rely on my husband much more than before. I recently had to drive somewhere that I’d not been to in a long while, and realized it made me a bit nervous.
I decided right then that I needed to embrace that part of myself that used to exist. What if my world changed tomorrow? What if I lost my husband? It would be much more difficult if I had to face a future like that without the courage to take risks.
I have a nice example of how discomfort brought some fascinating insight : I traveled to Colombia with a friend, knowing that it wasn't exactly my kind of place but hey he seemed so happy to go there with me 🤷♂️
It went terrible. The place was so loud, I literally spent some time alone in the dark everyday just to recover. I was depressed. I was looking for earlier flights back home, but they were so expensive. I couldn't enjoy this beautiful trip like my friend could.
Back home, I looked for reasons why I felt so bad. This trauma was so big I couldn't look away. I had to understand why it happened. Noise seemed like a good candidate. I discovered little earplugs made to soften some kind of noises on Instagram. I bought them, even if I thought they were a scam.
My god, they saved my life ! Not only on trips, but also in restaurants, in the crowd, at public events like concerts, in the office... Even without these earplugs I can now say with confidence that I'm not weirdly sad or hating people : it's just that my ears are sensitive. I can walk away, find a calmer spot, try to focus on something nice...and it helps. This was a great insight from a terrible experience. Now I wonder if I could go back to Colombia with my newfound superpower 😁
Comfort has been a way to reset, retreat from a life which was too hard for me. I've been working remote for 2 years now, and I now feel the need and energy to go outside again. I finally started therapy. I signed up in a co-working space to meet new people. I started piano. It works! Some things are easier now than before, like handling annoying people for example. I'm also practicing showing another less shy version of me. It works as well! I can now say whatever comes to my mind, and then change my mind and say it and not regret saying what I said in the first place ! Sounds obvious for a lot of people, but it was hard for me to be at ease with that imperfect image of myself. It felt like making an idiot of myself 😅
I prefer watching a concert on tv than being there in person, maybe it's because I figure it would be rather difficult to recharge if I'm at the venue. I just want to be sure not to lose a grip on myself when the emotional turmoil hits.
As a professional, I’m strong as a granite rock and can only be silenced by new knowledge .
As myself, I’m so weak, so weak. If I could hide under the rock just to be out of sight, I would do that.
Fighting for others, I’m a lioness. But I don’t dare to speak up for myself, cause there is a chance that I really ain’t good enough. And I don’t want to risk that anyone would tell me that 😢
This article is particularly relatable for me at the moment. I've wanted to travel the world for as long as I can remember but I always seem to find a reason not to. I started a new job, got a house, new car... living relatively comfortable, work 4 days a week from home... but I still have the itch to travel. My current job ends next Spring and I said to myself if I go then I need to decide around the new year to give me chance to line things up. I think the uncertainties are holding me back and I've been pursuing more "comfortable" challenges closer to home e.g. promotions, fitness etc.. I know if I don't go it will haunt me, but yet I'm hesitant to jump into the unknown, even if good experiences await. Glad to know others are fighting the same battle!
I have always been called shy and introverted. Quiet. But people close to me also see my crazy, funny and silly side. I figure if I can be outgoing with people I know the only thing stopping me from doing that with people I don't know is: Me. I start small. I make eye contact and give a smile or say good morning to a stranger as we pass each other on the street. I have given myself a target of 2-3 people to do this with every week. That also forces me to leave my house 😆
I want a life that challenges me with discomfort and new possibilities for growth, but at the same time, I'm too afraid of uncertainties. Whenever things go out of my plans or out of control. I almost lost my direction and mind. I'm trying to manage it but it's difficult, my fear always steps in and forces me to play the "safe game" although inside of me, someone wants to be challenged and wants growth, but I think the same human inside me is afraid of discomfort and stops me... It's like a tug of war inside...
Lloyd
Having trodden the safe path since the middle of the last century I know what pleases me and keeps me feeling comforted. I have always shied away from that feeling of uncertainty unless heaved in by circumstance, and always having come out the other side in one piece, I have been looking for challenges that let me ease (somewhat) out of the comfort zone. I have always found it difficult to let myself go in social situations, but with people I know, it is very easy to let the (I believe) real me out of his cage. I have found over the years that it doesn't hurt too much to Embare your ass once in a while. Figuratively of course.
As I am in a new relationship and meeting new people quite regularly I have the opportunity to try and put this new attitude into practice. Sometimes it works better than others. I can always retreat into comfort when I wish, but for now, pushing the envelope a little more than I am used to is order of the day. So far so good, growth is sometimes painful but in the end worth the struggle.
I was in the customer service business for years, in a position that essentially forced me to meet and befriend people. Apparently, my introverted self managed it well, as when I told people I was very shy, I heard disbelief.
I’ve not worked outside the home for years now, and I love it! I definitely would choose the safe environment. However, I’ve found that I have increasingly become less independent, and rely on my husband much more than before. I recently had to drive somewhere that I’d not been to in a long while, and realized it made me a bit nervous.
I decided right then that I needed to embrace that part of myself that used to exist. What if my world changed tomorrow? What if I lost my husband? It would be much more difficult if I had to face a future like that without the courage to take risks.
I have a nice example of how discomfort brought some fascinating insight : I traveled to Colombia with a friend, knowing that it wasn't exactly my kind of place but hey he seemed so happy to go there with me 🤷♂️
It went terrible. The place was so loud, I literally spent some time alone in the dark everyday just to recover. I was depressed. I was looking for earlier flights back home, but they were so expensive. I couldn't enjoy this beautiful trip like my friend could.
Back home, I looked for reasons why I felt so bad. This trauma was so big I couldn't look away. I had to understand why it happened. Noise seemed like a good candidate. I discovered little earplugs made to soften some kind of noises on Instagram. I bought them, even if I thought they were a scam.
My god, they saved my life ! Not only on trips, but also in restaurants, in the crowd, at public events like concerts, in the office... Even without these earplugs I can now say with confidence that I'm not weirdly sad or hating people : it's just that my ears are sensitive. I can walk away, find a calmer spot, try to focus on something nice...and it helps. This was a great insight from a terrible experience. Now I wonder if I could go back to Colombia with my newfound superpower 😁
Comfort has been a way to reset, retreat from a life which was too hard for me. I've been working remote for 2 years now, and I now feel the need and energy to go outside again. I finally started therapy. I signed up in a co-working space to meet new people. I started piano. It works! Some things are easier now than before, like handling annoying people for example. I'm also practicing showing another less shy version of me. It works as well! I can now say whatever comes to my mind, and then change my mind and say it and not regret saying what I said in the first place ! Sounds obvious for a lot of people, but it was hard for me to be at ease with that imperfect image of myself. It felt like making an idiot of myself 😅
I prefer watching a concert on tv than being there in person, maybe it's because I figure it would be rather difficult to recharge if I'm at the venue. I just want to be sure not to lose a grip on myself when the emotional turmoil hits.
As a professional, I’m strong as a granite rock and can only be silenced by new knowledge .
As myself, I’m so weak, so weak. If I could hide under the rock just to be out of sight, I would do that.
Fighting for others, I’m a lioness. But I don’t dare to speak up for myself, cause there is a chance that I really ain’t good enough. And I don’t want to risk that anyone would tell me that 😢
I also have difficulty in noisy locations! I’ve always attributed it to being a sensitive person. Crowds, noise; no thank you! My
This article is particularly relatable for me at the moment. I've wanted to travel the world for as long as I can remember but I always seem to find a reason not to. I started a new job, got a house, new car... living relatively comfortable, work 4 days a week from home... but I still have the itch to travel. My current job ends next Spring and I said to myself if I go then I need to decide around the new year to give me chance to line things up. I think the uncertainties are holding me back and I've been pursuing more "comfortable" challenges closer to home e.g. promotions, fitness etc.. I know if I don't go it will haunt me, but yet I'm hesitant to jump into the unknown, even if good experiences await. Glad to know others are fighting the same battle!
Ugh, sorry. My discomfort would be going to a concert that my daughter wants me to go with her. Jury is still out on that one.